Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Lorena Bobbitt, Makeover Edition

In June 1993, John Wayne Bobbitt came home from a night of drinking, found his wife asleep, had sex with her anyway, and then experienced a feeling of profound loss when she cut off his penis. The bastard deserved it, she told police, because he never gave her enough time to have an orgasm.

Now blond, 39, and speaking much better English, Lorena Bobbitt is the mother of a two year old daughter, a real estate agent and hairdresser, and the director of Lorena's Red Wagon, a fund for abused women with mental health issues. And she's been engaged to a "wonderful" man named Dave for 14 years... which means that he slipped a ring on her finger just one year after she flipped a penis out her car window. WB speculates that this brave hero has balls of titanium, an unfortunate metaphor given the circumstances.

Now here's the thing: venerable CBS News has decided that all of this is newsworthy, running the story on "The Early Show." We suggest filing it under "trash culture" and hoping it doesn't mean that a reality show is in the works.

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